Life Of A Shy Bad Guy Episode 14/Fictions - Kendogist - Latest Nigerian Music MP3 and Videos Downloads

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Monday, 2 April 2018

Life Of A Shy Bad Guy Episode 14/Fictions


Praise the Lord, the pastor shouted.
Halleluiah, the congregation responded with a loud voice.
Pastor: welcome my fellow Christians, our sermon today is ‘’fornication is not good’’
So, if you are a child of God deviate from this act because it will destroy both your body and soul.
Let get down to this now. Halleluiah he shouted.
Amen, response from the congregation.
Kelvin: the shout amen na
Jona: wetin
Pastor: Amen
Congregation: Amen
The pastor went on with his sermon, Jona was already nodding off, Kelvin hit him on the head
Jona: guy chillax na, person no fit sleep in peace again.
Kelvin: na your father parlour ni
The church runs three service, they have holy ghost time, offering and tithe preaching and the last sermon.
It was time for holy ghost time service and a lady walked in stylishly.
Jona: omo see hooku
Kelvin: your matter weak me oo, preaching deh since you sleep na weh you don girl your face don clear
Jona: she the come here, guy package yourself, no go loose guard
Kelvin was feeling shy now because he can’t look girls straight in the face. Omo yawa don burst, he thought because the girl was coming to sit on the chair next to him.
Kelvin: make we exchange chair (feeling nervous)
Jona: no sit down there, na you go yarn am today
Kelvin: abeg na, na church be dis ooo
Jona: about the film I told you yesterday you are about to watch it
Kelvin: which film n…….. (he was about to complete what he was saying when the girl sat down).
What? Kelvin nearly said it out. Sighting the fleshy lap of the lady. The girl was actually wearing a mini skirt, the type that when a girl is walking she will be adjusting a hundred times.
Kelvin stole a glance at Jona.
Jona smiled and stared at it not minding what the other members might say or think.
He whispered into Kelvin’s hear.
Jona: o boy na that film weh I the talk about
Kelvin: I swear you the craze (almost laughing)
Jona: for church again, you the insult get behind me satan
Kelvin: ehen so you know say we deh church and you are busy looking at fleshy laps.
Jona: omo, stop talking and enjoy your film
Kelvin: may God help you
Jona: No, may God help both of us
Pastor: they are some of you hear you can’t received the holy ghost because of your filthy minds, make your ways straight with God, for all sinners, all fornicators are going to hell.
Jona: wetin that nigger for stage the yarn like this na, make church close make I yarn this girl
Kelvin: shuu, you no the fear God
The holy ghost stuff finished, it was time for tithe and offering
The person handling tithe came out and preach non-stop about tithe, the benefits and the curse accompanying those who did not pay tithe.
Jona: ogbeni do commot joh, I be team Daddyfreeze, who tithe epp
Those sitting around that place turned to look at Jona. Jona didn’t feel any iota of shame and these baffles Kelvin who cant look at a person straight in the face, but here sit his friend which many eye is peering and he is feeling like nothing just happen.
Kelvin: see as you deh make people look us like say we steal their money
Jona: gather liver joh, fear fear boy
Those who have their tithe paid theirs
It was now time for offering, the offering coordinator mount the stage.
But he did not spend too much time preaching about offering before, they started singing and beating drums, members danced to the front to put their offering in the offering box.
Kelvin was expecting them to pass the box round, he hate doing that because he can’t bear having to wait for a person dancing in front of him. Jona stood and started dancing.
Jona: you no get money, abi wetin
Kelvin: I get, I no wan go help me put the money in the box for me biko
Jona: no be only biko stand up make we go
Kelvin: abeg pls
Jona: shy shy, stand make we dance to the front if your luck shine you fit deh for back of girl sef
Kelvin: chai, for church again they is God
Jona: stand make we go (dragging him up)
Kelvin (feeling embarrassed): guy e be like say you don engage in Science Student things oo free me joh (pulling back Jona’s hand)
Kelvin stood up reluctantly ‘’omo see crowd, my shirt the squeeze I no iron nam, which kain wahala be dis, they go the stare at me now’’. He thought.
Jona was dancing wildly, and Kelvin on the other side was losing his patience.
Kelvin: guy commot now my front na, see as you the embarrass yourself here.
Jona: guy dance to the Lord, the lord is good
Kelvin: hypocrite (he almost shouted)
Jona: omo watch film na (pointing to a girl dancing shaku shaku)
Kelvin: chai for church again, this church holy ooo
Jona: you never see anything yet
Jona: omo see pastor with legbegbe movement
Kelvin: this church no be here ooo too much of film scene
Jona: hahaha (laughing): your head don correct
Kelvin: e never correct before
It take them long to get to the offering box because of the population of the church.
In front of the offering box a guy of 20 years old brought out his money, but unfortunately what he brought out was a condom and it felled down
People around him shouted ‘’ehhhhh’’
Jona: oga pick your thing na, e no matter even pastor self the bleep
Crowd ‘’ehhhhhh’’
Jona: wetin be eh eh eh na lie I talk
The guy picked his thing, put his offering in the box and went to sit down
Jona: ehen correct guy e no even send anybody if na this my guy now e go the shake like woman (referring to Kelvin)
Kelvin: ok that your guy ba
Jona: I deh talk about you
Pastor: you come here (pointing at Jona)



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